Undeserved

i'm trapped inside this cage
with only a lie,
weaved by my own tongue.
tell me if anyone
will save me now,
why should they save me?

my head is turning
and i can't really see
the person coming after me.
whoever you are,
what do you see
in a lost soul like me?

pulled through the webs
of my deceit
my life was saved that night.
tell me why did you
save me then
why should you save me?

my head was turning
and I couldn't see
the person coming after me.
Whoever you are,
you saw something
in a lost soul like me.

what did you see... in me?

he turned his head
and smiled at me.
he turned around
and walked away.

Whoever he was
he saw something
in a lost soul like me
whoever he was
he saw something
in me.

The Story No One Knows

A story i longed to share with you
my eyes closed fast
my soul couldn't last.
all i wanted was to show you
who i really was
show you
who i really cared about.
because i lived a lie
A lesson i longed to teach you
with my last breaths
my fading heart
all i wanted was to teach you
what i knew
but i guess
you thought already knew it all.
my story is lost with me
maybe you didn't deserve it anyway
yet had you been there, you would have seen
as my eyes closed...
as my soul died,
those already lost had cried
cried with me
because all i wanted
was to share with you the story
the story that could have saved you
the lesson of life that no one knows
until it's too late to change it

why would you not just... at least listen?

Beyond The Masquerade

Thousands of people circle the room
the dance a new lie to the same old tune
I close my eyes to imagine
the prized masquerade

Alone is this room they cannot see me
I have outdone them all
I am hidden within where they cannot be
Beyond this masquerade

Ask me to dance and I shall decline
for this hidden face is not mine
Ask me my name and I shall not tell
if I even have one at all
Ask me why I hide alone here
and I will tell you why

I'm beyond this masquerade

My dress is beautiful lace trimmed silk
my mask of gold and green
green for the vines on a castle wall
and gold for the sun
that makes them grow tall
i have outdone them all.

Ask me to dance and I shall decline
for this hidden face is not mine
Ask me my name and I shall not tell
if I even have one at all
Ask me why I hide alone here
and I will tell you why

I'm beyond this masquerade
and I've outdone them all

Ask me to dance and I shall decline
for this hidden face is not mine
Ask me my name and I shall not tell
if I even have one at all
Ask me why I hide alone here
and I will tell you why

I'm beyond this masquerade
Ask me to dance
Ask me my name
Take my hand and lead me away
From this place
Because i've outdone them all
Beyond this wretched masquerade

Beautiful Souls

Oh beautiful souls cry, cry with us
long lost loves, tragic deaths
cry with us, help us see
you’ve been where we are
seen it all before
help us really be
Out of hand our world is
shaped so recklessly
we don’t know how we got here,
and we don’t know why we chose this path
all we know is we need wisdom
light the way and bring us home
Oh incredible souls cry, your battle cry
endless tears, endless years
cry with us, our battle cry
you’ve heard what we hear
fought it all before
help us truly see
Out of hand our world is
shaped, so recklessly!
I don’t know how we got here,
and I don’t know who chose this path
all I know is it wasn’t me
light the way and bring me home

In A Reverie

angry at the world and everyone in it
i want to be lost, may God permit it
i want to be where no one can find me
so i run far away, away from reality
past my town, into the trees
down a path, that nobody sees
and once i achieve what i set out to do
i'll add some tears to the present dew
to be honest
i don't want to be found, not in the slightest
i get up to find a better position
i hear a voice calling, perhaps with a mission?
but i don't want to be found, i run with fear
i feel as if my feelings are sheer
as if my whole purpose in hiding
is in vain, to myself i am lying
i cannot hide, no matter how far i run
i will always be seen by ... someone?
but no, i don't want to be found, please no
my whole life feels like a public show
deeper in the dark i feel my hands tremble
i need my feelings inside to assemble
what have i done to deserve this strain
all i want is to be hidden, to keep myself sane
tell me oh please, what can I do?
how can i escape my life, the people i know...how can i escape you?
a voice before, barely audible
came to me now, in my thoughts
deep inside of me
in a reverie
what do you tell me?
i don't want to hide?
all of this time you left me dying inside?
no, said the voice
i felt my eyes glisten, as the voice replied
"you simply would not listen"
then i realized all of my pain
was gone for a moment
my mind clear of all strain
maybe
i thought
i do want to be found.
i walked back, in silence
i looked down the path of my recent escape
than said to myself, i do.
i want to be found.
to be held, to be loved.
i want to live my life and see
what i can learn
but why i can't be
forever
in a reverie.

Grand Piano

colored as the midnight sky
keys of ivory and ebony stone
a piano sits calmly, waiting
waiting, for you.
to give it a chance
to bring things to life in different tones
explore the musical staff
boast it's notes and flaunt its role
it's just waiting for you to bring you places you never knew of
give you freedoms you never had.
life is there...it's just waiting.

Singing My Song

Away from my home, singing my song. I walked down a lane which seemed oh, so long. I stopped singing my song, once I lost sight. I didn't care what I did, what was considered right. A house there once was, though forewarned not to enter. I found myself at its doors, directly at the center.To visit its rooms I pined, its occupants to implore. To unlock its secrets, open its doors. Pondering silently if I should carry through, I thought "If I've come this far, what else should I do?". I opened the door and realized only too late, when I stepped inside that door, it altered my fate.The darkness inside seemed way too appeasing. The cold, dark, walls and cotton web stairs were way too pleasing.I was frightened at first, but I felt so free. So ready to live, and be all I could be. Little did I know, when to me that freedom came, my soul left in exchange, in some sort of game. As I turned to leave, the latch on the door locked shut. As I was trapped, I knew only to look up, And as I looked up the door opened wide with a clear view of what lay outside. I followed the lane home where I knew I belonged, Looked up once again, and began singing my song.

Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time, there was a girl. It’s a typical beginning, nothing special. Although stereotypically speaking, in cases such as these (with the beginning, as it is), the plot would be much more simplified. It could be about an innocent child, an ignorant father… evil relations. All of which get their reward, good or bad, in the end. Or perhaps, a beautiful girl locked in a tower, with hair so long her beau can visit her by means of climbing it. In the end good always triumphs over evil, the enemies always pay for the trouble they’ve caused, and the end justifies the means. It’s a pity life isn’t a fairytale. This girl was the same as any other girl. She wanted to fit in, she wanted to feel loved. Like so many before us, she gave into the traps created to make us fail. You could be this girl. It doesn’t matter who you are, how perfect your life is, how strong or determined you are. You can always change or be changed, succeed or fail. It’s a pity life ruins our innocence. It’s a pity that we aren’t locked in a tower, protected from the world, and all the sadness it brings. The saddest part is that this story did start off like a fairy tale. We were innocent. We were beautiful. Living in this confusing world, can we regain our innocence, remember our dreams once had? Recapture our very souls?

Taking a stroll down the sidewalk one day, I realized that the sky seemed to be very dull. It was even more lusterless then it normally was this time of year. I can honestly declare that the weather was dreadful, indeed. I decided to take a walk across the park, why on such a day, I shall never know. But why I decided what I did is not crucial, or relevant. What is most important is that I did it. I was walking at a minimal pace and found myself lost in thought. I paused for a moment, when two young boys came into view. They were playing with toy guns. What I was thinking at that moment I cannot quite recall, but I felt a sudden uneasiness while watching the boys and decided to walk on promptly. As I had begun to walk, I heard a gunshot. I quickly looked behind to see one boy lying on the ground, the other with a panic-stricken look on his face, holding the gun, and staring down at the child who lay there dead. The mother was lying over her son in tears and with pain, and the heartbreaking look on her face I shall never forget. I was long gone before the ambulance arrived. Sometimes things happen because of reasons beyond our control. Other times, they happen at our own doing. Seeing the door to my apartment complex I ran as quickly as I could, tripped up the stairs to my room and slammed the door behind me. I thought a moment, and tried to regain my composure. I must be dreaming… It has to be a dream. This isn't possible. My attention was diverted to, of all things, the roof of my apartment. It vanished and I saw a giant child looking down at me. I was too stunned to scream, but my jaw dropped in awe as I saw her reach down to pick me up. I looked at my hands; only to see myself turning into plastic as well. I then realized that I was transforming into a doll. As I was unable to move or talk, I started to lose my train of thought and for a very short time experienced a pain too deep to describe. I think it was when I realized that I had absolutely no say in this world. Then, soon enough, I was unable to think and in a state of nothingness.

In this life, there are so many distractions. Things that seem so innocent can be so deadly. We live our life playing a game, but it isn't a game without consequences. We can't think for ourselves anymore, and we don't even know it. Living in the world that we do, we must be careful to stand for what we believe in while we have the ability to. Very soon we are all going to cry out... "Why do I have no say?" And very soon they will tell us, "You haven't for awhile now... In case you haven't noticed."